I laugh so much at myself for my absolute lack of focus and memory. I was just taking the remote from the side table to the shelf over the TV and when I got to the shelf my hand was empty. Of course I first look around for the “culprit” even though I am alone. When my eyes land on our dog I can only assume she grew opposable thumbs and snatched it ninja like out of my hand. Bad dog!
Of course I find it on the kitchen counter where I forgot I had also picked up something else in my travels and put it and the remote on the counter. Didn’t even recall going to the kitchen till I saw what I had done.
It is a phenomenon with me. The running joke wherever I go is that I meant to leave my (insert any number of items here) behind. It is insurance I will be back to visit.
What is even funnier is that this lapse of presence even affects my actual hand. Only my right but still very strange indeed. I have been known more than a few times to dump drinks, plates, etc. I don’t mean accidentally spill. I have been sitting having a perfectly pleasant conversation with some friends over coffee. For no reason I simply started pouring the coffee onto the table. I watched it happen but for some reason I didn’t associate it with my own hand so didn’t understand I should stop. Or I will just throw/drop things. Same thing. Just holding it then my hand decides it has had enough of that and there the object goes to the ground or across the room.
I am also quite horrible at remembering people. I have worked with a school for 3 years and outside of the office staff and a couple of teachers and one really sweet little boy, I am hard pressed to know who is approaching me or saying hi. I try to avoid going on campus during pick up or drop off times as someone will inevitably want to talk to me. I can literally see someone 5 times and I have no idea who they are. I know the names of families because I see them repeatedly for billing. But can not connect to any faces.
I am quite the stealthy girl in public. We live in a smaller town where you are bound to run into people you “know”. I will see someone who looks familiar and panick. I quickly if possible find the nearest solid cover. Another isle, rush around a corner, run into a shop, any way I can avoid that feared eye contact. Shoot they saw me…. crap now I have to go fake it…. “Oh hey …. you”. (in my head it’s “say something to tell me who you are… a hint… come on … )
I won’t even go into tests cause I think it goes without saying. Wait I just said something. Ok so it goes with minimal saying LOL.
The one area I seem to have tons of room in my noggin is random facts about things I am watching or interested in at the moment that generally holds no world value. If I watch a show, I will have to research dang near everything behind the scenes. Like did you know that that Kelsey Grammer sang the theme song for Fraser. Or that most of the callers to his radio show were actual celebrities really calling on the phone. Stuff like that.
Recently I have become obsessed with Bruce Lee. The man was crazy good. Which because he was in a movie with Jackie Chan, led me to find out Jackie Chan hasn’t ever actually fought martial arts outside of movies. He did go to classes but his teacher said Jackie was not a very good student. I would have thought he would have been a fighting genious. Would have loved to see what his non acting fighting style would look like…. Wait … shocker…I’m getting off topic… anyhoo …..
Oh the mind. You flaky, kooky, funny little guy.