So, I get a LOT of scammers reaching out and I finally have my response created for all texts or emails  I receive, to just copy and paste for the sheer joy it brings me.  and I just had to share in my delight.  It isn’t funny but it sure does make me feel better to do it. I’m sure there are some witty replies readily available, but I like mine just fine.

The invitation

Dear Jennifer,

This is to inform you that after critical and proper review of your
resume posted on, we are please to inform you that you
have met the requirements needed for the post of Payment Officer /
Book Keeper with The Oregon Craft Company.

Furthermore, Your duties as the Payment Officer / Book Keeper is to
collect payments from our numerous customers within your region,
process the payments, deduct 10% of the amount issued to you as your
personal bonus and you transfer the rest of the funds to our main
account officer whose information will be provided to you in due time.

This Job position is Temporary and does not require a specific work
time frame. All payments will be mailed directly to you via your
mailing / contact address. This position became necessary when lots of
payments is being received from various customers from different
regions / states within the United States and Canada per day and it
became very tedious to process and sort, as a result of this, the
search for representatives to sort / process payments on behalf of the
company became highly necessary.

If you are interested in this Job offer, Please do forward the
following information written in bold as soon as possible:

Full Name:
Full Contact / Home Address:
Phone Number:
Age / Date of Birth:
Present Job (If Any):
Marital Status:
Email Address:

Thank you very much and we anticipate your working with The Oregon
Craft Company.

For The Oregon Craft Company.

My response:

To  Madison Sims

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